So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
