so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
