i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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