Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize