I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
