You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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