Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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