You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
