You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize