its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Randomize
