I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Randomize
