I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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