I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize