I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
