we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
