Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize