Screwed.edu
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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