u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
either way he was missing a nipple.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize
