i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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