i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
