why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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