69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
