I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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