called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
