Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Randomize
