I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize