Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
