Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize