Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Non-Jews are for practice
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
