She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
