wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
