How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
