the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
