First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
