It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
