called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
i've created a new STD.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
