We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
How naked do you want me to be?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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