So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
