Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
