How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
