My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
