i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
where are my eyebrows?
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