Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
