And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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