Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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