are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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