she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
jump out the window naked night went bad
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