no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize