margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
