I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
