I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
