I'm really into asian looking animals
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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