i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
